The War Between the Ages: Boomer vs. Millennial - Part I

Our #Blennial thoughts about perceived areas of contention between generations

I’m convinced the news feeds strive to promote war between these generations. I mean, for goodness sake. This ongoing feud prompts me to quote Rodney King’s famous line, “Can't we all get along?"

Let’s face it. Older generations never completely understand those coming along behind them. I remember when rock and roll was going to be the death of my peers (more about music to come). Yet, for the most part, we grew to become responsible adults. Now as Boomers, we’re being accused of the same damning behavior. Perhaps, some of us deserve the accusation but I, for one, have a great deal of respect, not only for Millennials, but young adults in general. The issue we all need to recognize is that times change, and we need to adjust to what’s happening in the present.

One of the biggest gripes I’m told young adults have is with the statement, “You’ll understand when you’re older.”

The Millennials I associate with are smart, capable and progressive. Although none of them are my children (sometimes they behave like they are), I am extremely proud of their accomplishments. I truly believe age has nothing to do with understanding. It’s how one deals with life circumstances that matters in the end. I do, however, think some level of wisdom comes with age and experience.

The longer you are on this earth, the more you learn. For example, I remember my sister and I had a good laugh when she revealed she’d given her godchild the one response she vowed she would never repeat when she got older and that was “Because I said so.” As an adult she came to understand that children will take you there.

Tied to this idea is the notion that the older generations know what’s best regarding taking certain paths in life. While we don’t want those we care about to make the same mistakes we did, in reality, the choice is not up to us.

I believe everyone has to step out there and experience both the successes and the bumps in the road. IF my Millennial friends ask for advice, all I can do is relate my experience in a similar situation and offer potential pitfalls, but ultimately they have to make their own decision. Even if I feel they’re making a mistake, my best course of action is to stand by and offer as much support as I can.

Returning to the topic of music. I must admit I do not listen to, nor do I particularly care for the music of today. After recently watching Cooley High and enjoying the wonderful Motown lyrics, I was reminded of the music creativity of the 60s, 70s and 80s. And because my parents exposed me to their music, my appreciation goes back to compositions from the 40s and 50s.

In my opinion, today’s music doesn’t hold a candle to the music of my generation and the one before me. But who am I to say? I just wonder whether the Now Generation will still feel the same about their music as I do about the music of my time when they get older.

Pamela’s word of wisdom:

Old adages are very telling. They can reveal a lot about you - culture, location, age - or at least a lot of what you pick up and pay attention to. I have a friend, 10 years my senior, who hit me with a "girl, I got some good grist from the gristmill." Side eye was given.

The same day she laid on me, "look, just chew up the meat and spit out the bones," encouraging me to move on with my life and not get defensive. It wasn't until my introduction to these apparent classics that I noticed them on the tongue of other friends and elders. 

Therefore, I see no need for war between the generations. The cross pollination is beneficial all around. I have come to an even greater appreciation for both history and wisdom since losing the keeper of both, my mother, in 2018. Even before then, my grandparent complex and passion for antiquing led me.

With eclectic benevolence, millennials exact appreciation across genres and their place in time.

I am, however, guilty of grumbling, "Kids and their music," when I pull up next to peer moms with tweens bumping something rowdy, recent and ratchet off the radio. My fight is more with the industry producing the trash rather than the disillusioned ears enjoying it.

I mean, today's producers and executives had mothers who grew up with Whitney Houston, Gladys Knight, Prince, Aunt Patti and Phyllis Hyman across the airwaves. As much as Part A Millennials like me knew boy bands and alternative pop rock of the early 2000s were a fad, we actually appreciated the lyricism of Tupac, Nas and the gifts of select others in latter years.

My mom was a teacher. She was born to educate and raise children. She spent her entire career in one district, rising in ranks and joining board administration before retirement. Being the daughter of a teacher or any leader is not easy. As much as you want to make them proud of you, you find yourself rebelling against their success record or measuring yourself up against it, doing your best to not become them.

As I mature and heal through loss, I can boldly admit the truth: Mom was always right. I just never realized until long after I began to borrow her phrases and tendencies.

The real question: What about GenZ? Will they gain the same understanding millennials have post-adolescence? Sound off below!

Peace!